The Silverware
by Abigail Marie
Summary: Williby has the stupidest power ever, the best dental hygiene. And this fic is short and stupid so if you have time to waste, come on over! One shot.


A/N: I blame this fiction entirely on brother. If you think it's really stupid, that's okay. Come back really late at night or when you're really tired. You might find it amusing.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own x-men...or anything in this fiction. It was my brother's idea; I just wrote it and added what I could. _______________________________________________________________________  
  
My name is Williby Walker III. I'm a mutant. Right about now you'd be expecting me to say that I was taken in an old bald man in a wheel chair and now I'm a part of the X-men. Well, that was the case until a couple of hours ago. I mean I knew no one was especially fond of me but.....well, I guess I should start from the beginning.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------  
  
A small group had gathered in the kitchen. Professor Xavier had announced he had something new to show everyone. The room was full of murmured conversations, each equally curious as to what the professor had to show.  
  
The conversations hushed once the Xavier rolled into the room. He was carrying a neatly wrapped box on his lap. He carefully placed it on the table. "Jean, would you like to open it?"  
  
Delicately, Jean unwrapped the box and opened it. She gave a little gasp.  
  
"Awesome!" Cyclops said, grabbing the box from behind her. "Look everyone! This is silverware rocks!!" Cyclops held the box up for everyone to see.  
  
"Wow, professor. Where did you get such fine silverware?" Hank asked after examining the amazing utensils.  
  
"I found it at this great little thrift store. I know I shouldn't have bought it but I know it's so much better then Magneto's. I couldn't help myself."  
  
"Well, this will be another thing you have over Magneto." Angel said with a smile.  
  
"Besides your superior intellect." Jean added.  
  
"Ha ha ha ha ha!!" Everyone laughed as they passed the silverware around.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Little did they know that they very Magneto they spoke of was closer then they realized.  
  
"Ha Ha Ha!! I'm closer then they realize!"  
  
Squinting at the window, Magneto stood trying to see what was going on.  
  
"I can't see what's going on."  
  
"Perhaps you should use your binoculars?" Mystique responded in a bored voice from her comfortable position, with her back against the Institute wall. She had no intention of getting up.  
  
"Why don't you look in for me?"  
  
"I have no intention of getting up."  
  
"Fine. I'll use the binoculars."  
  
After carefully placing the binoculars over his eyes, Magneto banged them up against the window for a closer look.  
  
"What? What's this?" Magneto scraped the binoculars up and down on the window. "This-this is amazing. That silverware! It has the ability to shrink Xavier's head!! And that would mean....his brain would get smaller!! With that kind of power, I could wipe out the human race!" Magneto let the binoculars hang around his neck. He clenched his hands into fists. "I must have that silverware!" He picked up the binoculars again and stared through the window menacingly.  
  
Inwardly rolling her eyes, Mystique tapped her "boss" on the shoulder.  
  
"Not now; I'm scheming."  
  
Impatiently, Mystique grabbed the binoculars and flipped them so that the words 'Captain Crunch' were no longer upside down.  
  
Magneto looked over at Mystique, then into the binoculars. "Wow, that is pretty nice silverware." he mumbled. Dropping the binoculars, he turned to Mystique. "I must have that silverware! Come Mystique, we must prepare for tonight"  
  
"What are we doing tonight?"  
  
"The same thing we do every night."  
  
"Sneak into the Institute and pig out on their leftovers?"  
  
Magneto paused, thinking over her question. "Almost. Except this time, their utensils will be coming home with us! Mwahahahaha!!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Okay everyone. Time to brush your teeth." These were the words that Williby dreaded the most. His room was right next to the bathroom, so it was hard to ignore all the scowls and wisps of conversation about him.  
  
"He, like, thinks he's so much better then us. Dental hygiene is like the stupidest power ever!" Kitty said to Rogue on their way to brush their teeth.  
  
"Ah know. Stupid little twerp. Ah don't even know whay he's here. It's naht like his powers are hard to control."  
  
Tonight he didn't want to hear it. He wandered downstairs slowly making his way to the kitchen. Perhaps if he at the gallon of ice cream he could pretend he needed to brush his teeth.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Magneto shoved another spoonful of Double Chocolate Fudge ice cream into his already full mouth. Swallowing it quickly, Magneto smiled. "Victory is sweet!" He scooped the last spoonful of ice cream. "Very sweet. Sugar.....I love sugar." Magneto looked over to where Mystique was standing, munching quietly on a Milkyway. "You know, blue is a very nice color on you." Magneto giggled.  
  
A loud creak diverted Magneto's attention to the doorway in front of him.  
  
In the doorway stood Williby, the new boy with unusually good dental hygiene. For a moment, the boy stood there, taking in the scene before him.  
  
Magneto sat in the kitchen, an empty gallon of ice cream in his lap, chocolate all over his face. The box of silverware lay on the table. But one was missing and Magneto held it tightly in his hand.  
  
Magneto stared at the boy. His eyes widened and his teeth gritted together. Slowly, he got up from his seat. The noise of the fallen container echoed throughout the kitchen.  
  
"BRAINFREEZE!!!" Magneto slapped his hands to his head and began running madly around the room.  
  
Aware that Magneto seemed distracted, Williby rushed in. He grabbed the box and tried to make a run for it.  
  
A tap on his shoulder caused Williby to turn around.  
  
"Give those back."  
  
"No."  
  
Magneto reached out his hand and grabbed the box from the kid. "Mine!"  
  
Williby looked around the room. He had to get that silverware back! But what could he do against Magneto? Just then, a thought struck him. Perhaps if he smiled, the shine from his unusually white teeth would blind Magneto. It was his only hope. Opening wide, poor Williby smiled as hard and as best he could.  
  
Magneto looked strangely at the smiling kid who had really nice teeth. Magneto looked back at Mystique who just shrugged her shoulders. Magneto smiled back at the kid. "You dare to defy the great Magneto!?"  
  
The kid just kept smiling.  
  
"Everyone at Xavier's school has fillings. I could own you!"  
  
The kid was still all smiles.  
  
"That's it! You've asked for it!" Magneto reached out his hand, expecting to soon see the kid writhing in pain.  
  
Still smiley whiley.  
  
"WHAT? No fillings? You are a freak!"  
  
SMILE!  
  
"You're creeping me out kid." And with that Magneto promptly punched Williby's lights out.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------  
  
That's pretty much it. Once I woke up I was blamed for helping Magneto steal the silverware. Not long after I was kicked out of the Institute. I think inwardly the Professor was jealous of my shiny teeth compared to his shiny head.  
  
I let out a soft sigh. No one appreciates good dental hygiene anymore. 


End file.
